Sunday, November 30, 2008

2 weeks notice

I have never realised how long two weeks really is. 2 weeks, 14 days, 336 hours, 20160 minutes, 1209600 seconds. A really long time. Long enough for a whole lot of shit to happen.

Let me start from the beginning which happens to be halfway through the story at the end of an already begun but beginning to end story. Are you with me? Good, hang on to your jockstraps and g-strings because this a long story from beginning to end.

Cast of characters

Loco: Me
T-Baby: My sistergurl from another not my mother! Beautiful, intelligent woman. The epitome of thee African Gurl. She is the one of the most responsible people I know, and has that aura of quiet maturity that we women all want to have.
S-Luv: My other sistergul from another not my mother. Intelligent, self-controlled, calm collected and angel faced. (But don't let the cute face fool you, we all know she's crazy as hell.... shhhhhh, that's a secret, hehe!)
Dipshit: T-baby's now ex. The name says it all.
Scarface: Irrelevant vulture skunk scavenger who just happened to fall into the story.

Wednesday 19th November:
S-Luv and I go to T-baby's place to chill for a while. Relax, and just collectively insanify. We notice T-baby is tense and stressed. Sometimes I try to picture the expression on Atlas' face as he shoulders the weight of the world, today I see the very same expression etched on T-baby's face. We ask her what's on her mind. It's a long story she says, she'll tell us over lattes and chocolate indulgence on Friday night. We reassure her that we've got her back no matter what. You see, the three of us are gurlfriends. The rare kind of friendship which very few people get to experience in a lifetime. Three gurls from completely different parts of the world with a connection that binds us. But anyway, I digress (readjusting tangent here)

Around 4am in the morning, after we've each gone our different ways, I'm in bed watching sex and the city season 6 for the umpteenth time and I hear a knock on my bedroom door. *Mumbling and grumbling, can't y'all let a sista be?!!* I go open the door and T-baby is standing there, "I need to watch a movie". There are times when whats not being said echos much louder than what rolls off the tongue. The pain on T-baby's face.....

We get in and sex and the city is immediately pushed aside. "What's wrong T-baby, you know you can tell me anything" T-baby starts talking and releases a world of pain. I hold her as she tells me about how fucked up her past relationships have been. I wipe away the tears of a woman who has seen more than her fair share of messed up men from an early age, and who reacted the only way she knew how. I won't go into details. She had left it all behind to come here and heal.

So anyway, she had finally told Dipshit everything that had happened in her past. Instead of being a relatively supportive boyfriend (at that time) dipshit reacted by graphically explaining how disgusted by her he was.

The thing is T-baby has taken a whole lot of shit for and from Dipshit. His past was gorier and uglier than hers, and his past wasn't exactly the past but was presenting itself in the present. T-baby had taken it all in stride and supported him. When the tables were turned and she need just a wee bit of understanding and support from him.......

Dipshit, in line with his Dipshitness has an agression issue. Agression is normal, many non-dipshits deal with it. However the thing that dipshityfies Dipshit is that he choses to take out said agression on T-baby. I don't give a (flying fuck, rats ass, horse's dick, crying crap... Choose one ) what anyone thinks, in my books, any man who dares to raise a finger to a woman does not deserve to be called a man. When T-baby tells me that TWICE, dipshit has done exactly that, I got livid! Fury I had like hell hath no!!!! But I kept my shit together for T-baby's sake.

T-baby poured her soul out until she was drained. I tucked her in. She was leaving for home in 2 weeks. It would be best if she stayed with me till then.

Thursday 20th November:
We get her stuff from her house, an attempt at a discussion with Dipshit becomes potentially explosive. We walk away from it all. That's not what she needs, she has to centre, and calm the fuck down. We grab some chicken and fajitas (comfort food) and I radio head-quaters for reinforcements. S-Luv comes over to my place. Soon enough the three of us are stuffed, chatting and laughing. S-luv takes over as resident agony aunt. Now S-luv has been through her fair share of bullshit (a story for another day) So she empathises.

We talked it over with T-baby, she wanted to give Dipshit a chance to explain. We have already said all we have to say all that is left is to support whatever decision she makes.

Friday 21st November:
After Kofi Annan like mediation, T-Baby goes back to her house. They decide they'll go home, talk it over with their parents then make the final decision after that.

Monday 24th November:
T-Baby has the sneaky suspicion that dipshit is sleeping with Scarface. female intuition. But she has no evidence and he denies it. She lets it slide. But we all know that female intuition is usually on point like two dots on a line! And in this case, she was righter than rain if ever rain was right!

Wenesday 26th November:
*Nokia tune, its T-baby on the celly*
Loco: Aybaybay, how you doin!
T-baby: Where are you
Loco: I'm still trying to finish up with this work so that I can take it to the printers. We're still on for 6.00pm right?
T-baby: Urm, something has come up, can you meet me now?
Loco: (Looking over at bosslady who is breathing fire because we're pushing a deadline) Where are you?
T-baby: Cyberjaya police station.
Loco: WTF?!! Errr, okay, gimme half an hour I'll be there!

I got there to find her sporting a black-eye so horrific it looked like it had a life of it's own. He had punched the beejezuz out of her. T-baby had finally drew the line. She did not shed a single tear. She had calmly gotten a cab and gone the police report to file a report.

I can't even begin to explain how this has affected all of us personally on so many levels. No woman should have to put up with any shit like this from any man. I respect T-baby's strength, her self-control. I'd like to say that if it was me I'd have killed that piece of shyt dipshit. But after I saw what T-baby went through.....
She still smiles through the pain. " So I finally went and got myself a black eye! Hehe!" Thats what she says.

Soundtrack:
Beautiful flower - India Arie
Shine - India Arie

Bookshelf:
Is that the new moon? (an anthology of female poets) - Wendy cope


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

A man hitting a woman in this day and age? That is despicable, inexcusable and you're right, the girl has loads of self control. There's no excuse ever to beat a woman. Sorry if that came out too strong, violence against women's is something really close to my heart.

Hey, I like your blog.